Funny Instructions
10-Aug-2004, 11:33 PM
#1
Luka
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 14,319
Funny Instructions
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
sleep styling! 
11-Aug-2004, 11:11 AM
#8
Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mississauga
Posts: 3,193
Originally posted by shlammed
lol if anyone sued over any of those that would be killer
lol if anyone sued over any of those that would be killer
That is the actual reason why some of those warnings are on there, one person sues and then they put a warning on the product. Sad but true.
11-Aug-2004, 12:21 PM
#9
Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 270
some idiot in the states sued the fast food chains because that's all he ate and was obese.
the moron who drove with coffee between her legs and burnt herself (which many know of) originally won her case and then lost on an appeal.
if you are this stupid, stupid enough to try and stop a chainsaw with your hand, or eat peanuts, knowing that you are allergic to nuts, but eat them because there is no warning to say 'nuts', you are a frigging moron and deserve to die.
It should be a TV show on Fox or soemthing... when stupid people act! that's some prime time ****.
the moron who drove with coffee between her legs and burnt herself (which many know of) originally won her case and then lost on an appeal.
if you are this stupid, stupid enough to try and stop a chainsaw with your hand, or eat peanuts, knowing that you are allergic to nuts, but eat them because there is no warning to say 'nuts', you are a frigging moron and deserve to die.
It should be a TV show on Fox or soemthing... when stupid people act! that's some prime time ****.
13-Aug-2004, 12:13 PM
#12
Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Southern California
Posts: 6,405
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
great just great
well im suing the top 3 **** companies for giving me carpal tunnel syndrom.... they need a surgeon general's warning on all video boxes
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)
great just great
well im suing the top 3 **** companies for giving me carpal tunnel syndrom.... they need a surgeon general's warning on all video boxes
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