imported_BoOsTd

Got these in my email, had a good laugh, most of them were new to me

Enjoy



>>What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
>>Juan on Juan
>>
>>What is a Yankee?
>>The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.
>>
>>What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
>>The position of the dirt bag.
>>
>>Why is divorce so expensive?
>>Because it's worth it.
>>
>>What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
>>Doughnuts.
>>
>>Why is air a lot like sex?
>>Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
>> .
>>
>>What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a
>>room
>>together?
>>100 people who don't do dick.
>>
>>
>>SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE - PART II (JUST WARMING UP!)
>>
>>What do you call a smart blonde?
>>A golden retriever.
>>
>>What do attorneys use for birth control?
>>Their personalities.
>>
>>What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
>>45 lbs.
>>
>>What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
>>45 minutes.
>>
>>What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
>>Through his chest with a sharp knife.
>>
>>Why do men want to marry virgins?
>>They can't stand criticism.
>>
>>Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring,
>>and good-looking?
>>Because those men already have boyfriends.
>>
>>What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
>>After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
>>
>>What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
>>The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of
>>driving.
>>
>>A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade. Who has
>>the biggest *****?
>>The blonde, because she's 18.
>> >>
>>
>>What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
>>Are you sure it's mine?"
>> >>
>>Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
>>Mace will do that to you.
>> .
>>
>>Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
>>Breasts don't have eyes.
>>
>>SOMETHING TO OFFEND EVERYONE - PART III (Just Great Stuff)
>> >>
>>Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
>>A different bar.
>>
>>Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby?
>>They named him "Sum Ting Wong"
>>
>>What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the
>>other?
>>A speech impediment.
>> >>
>>How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
>>Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!
>>
>>What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern
>>fairytale?
>>A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern
>>fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this ****..."
>>
>>My, my, how times have changed.Years ago...When 100 white men
>>chased one black man, we called it the Ku Klux Klan; today they
>>call it the PGA TOUR.
>>
>>Why is there no Disneyland in China?
>>No one's tall enough to go on the good rides

spracingsports

one word to describe it: HELARIOUS!

imported_gatherer

funy stuff

Sleekef

oh man i pooped myself laughing

imported_Promoking

I liked the one about the blonde/golden retriever. I've got a golden and it's true, he's probably smarter than most other blondes ive met haha.

PULOVR

Sum Ting Wong

BarelyLegalCivi

OMG I SAID THE WIFE AND GIRLFREIDN JOKE AT WORK AND EVERYONE STARTED LAUGHING

GREAT POST

bbarbulo

iTrader: (2)

ROFLMAO.... position of the dirtbag hahaha

imported_jaysi

Lots of good ones!

Notorious

lol that was hilarious!

imported_ITK

lol that was great!

imported_BoOsTd

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hahah yah I couldnt wait to tell that one to my bro inlaw... he rolls on a 2000 FatBoy it gives me a wood eveytime i see it...