Joke Thread - Wednesday, April 23, 2003
23-Apr-2003, 04:24 PM
#1
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Location: Mississauga
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Joke Thread - Wednesday, April 23, 2003
#1
Mid-east Mystery?
I could not understand suicide bombers until I read this. It's clear to me now!
Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide. Lets see now...
No beer, No booze, No titty bars, No clubs, No television, No
cheerleaders, No baseball, No football, No basketball, No hockey,
and No tailgate parties, No Nascar, No pork BBQ, No hotdogs,
No burgers, No lobster, No shellfish, or even frozen fish sticks.
Rags for clothes, towels for hats. Constant wailing from the guy next door because he is sick and there are no doctors. 24 hour wailing from a guy in the tower.
You can't shave. Your wife can't shave. You can't shower to wash
off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel dung. The women have to wear baggy dresses, and veils at all times. Your
bride is picked by someone else. She smells just like your donkey,
but your donkey has a better disposition. Then they tell you it all gets better when you die.
Hmmm, NO MYSTERY HERE
#2
Saddam's Vice President calls all 12 of Saddam's body doubles to a meeting in Baghdad.
He explains that he has good news and bad news.
The good news is that their glorious leader, Saddam, has survived the American bombing campaign.
The bad news is he lost an arm.
#3
After getting a routine check-up, George Bush's doctor goes up to bush to tell him some bad news....
"I'm sorry, Mr.President, but something is wrong with your brain!...Your brain has two parts- the right side and left side.
The left part of your brain has nothing right in it, and the right part of your brain has nothing left in it."
Mid-east Mystery?
I could not understand suicide bombers until I read this. It's clear to me now!
Everyone seems to be wondering why Muslim terrorists are so quick to commit suicide. Lets see now...
No beer, No booze, No titty bars, No clubs, No television, No
cheerleaders, No baseball, No football, No basketball, No hockey,
and No tailgate parties, No Nascar, No pork BBQ, No hotdogs,
No burgers, No lobster, No shellfish, or even frozen fish sticks.
Rags for clothes, towels for hats. Constant wailing from the guy next door because he is sick and there are no doctors. 24 hour wailing from a guy in the tower.
You can't shave. Your wife can't shave. You can't shower to wash
off the smell of donkey cooked over burning camel dung. The women have to wear baggy dresses, and veils at all times. Your
bride is picked by someone else. She smells just like your donkey,
but your donkey has a better disposition. Then they tell you it all gets better when you die.
Hmmm, NO MYSTERY HERE
#2
Saddam's Vice President calls all 12 of Saddam's body doubles to a meeting in Baghdad.
He explains that he has good news and bad news.
The good news is that their glorious leader, Saddam, has survived the American bombing campaign.
The bad news is he lost an arm.
#3
After getting a routine check-up, George Bush's doctor goes up to bush to tell him some bad news....
"I'm sorry, Mr.President, but something is wrong with your brain!...Your brain has two parts- the right side and left side.
The left part of your brain has nothing right in it, and the right part of your brain has nothing left in it."
23-Apr-2003, 04:36 PM
#2
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Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Mississauga
Posts: 972
I got this via e-mail as well, thought it was pretty funny.
>>>CANADIAN PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
>>>
>>> As we all know, the Taliban considers it a sin for a man to see a naked woman who is not his wife. So, on Sunday, June 1, at 2:00 PM Eastern time, all Canadian women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour aids this anti-********* effort.
All men are to position themselves in
lawn chairs in front of their house to prove they are not Taliban,
demonstrate that they think it's okay to see nude women other than their wife and to show support for all Canadian women. And since the Taliban also does not approve of alcohol, a cold six-pack at your side is further proof of your anti-Taliban sentiment. The
Canadian Government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-********* activity.
>>>
>>>God Bless Canada!
>>>
>>>IT IS YOUR PATRIOTIC DUTY TO PASS THIS ON!
>>>CANADIAN PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
>>>
>>> As we all know, the Taliban considers it a sin for a man to see a naked woman who is not his wife. So, on Sunday, June 1, at 2:00 PM Eastern time, all Canadian women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour aids this anti-********* effort.
All men are to position themselves in
lawn chairs in front of their house to prove they are not Taliban,
demonstrate that they think it's okay to see nude women other than their wife and to show support for all Canadian women. And since the Taliban also does not approve of alcohol, a cold six-pack at your side is further proof of your anti-Taliban sentiment. The
Canadian Government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-********* activity.
>>>
>>>God Bless Canada!
>>>
>>>IT IS YOUR PATRIOTIC DUTY TO PASS THIS ON!
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